Me and My Boys

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Sobriety Tip # 599

     Beware of complacency!  I believe I've touched on this before but as I continue my recovery I fall into complacency at times so for a reminder I will look at it again.

     This last year has been incredible.  My life has been going extremely well, being sober, success in college, strong in faith, family prospering and growing.  This causes me to be cautious because I don't want to forget where I came from, what I've been through.  It's very possible to lose your sobriety when you lose focus of goals and dreams so, as a person recovering, it is important to be aggressive toward your sobriety.  Do whatever it takes to keep your sobriety in the forefront.  Incorporate your recovery into your daily activities.  Personally, I'm subscribed to several sites that are dedicated to sobriety, I attend different meetings, when possible, throughout the week, and I try to create dialogue and video concerning recovery as often as possible.  Even doing all of this, I still feel as though I'm not doing enough toward my recovery so I look for other ways to stay on top of my recovery.

     Most importantly, don't let your recovery fall to the wayside.  Be diligent in your efforts and keep your sobriety "fresh!"

Monday, October 10, 2011

Gettin’ My Needs Met


     A lot of strife that comes my way is due to self-centered thinking.  Seriously, when I’m thinking about what I need and then try to get it in my own power, I always come across opposition.  Most of my opposition comes in the form of other people not cooperating with my program.  I don’t believe I ask for much, but it’s become painfully apparent that the things I do ask for from family and friends are too much for them to handle.

     One of my issues is what I consider “proper respect” from my wife.  I’m 42 and relatively young but I come from an era of time when a man was the head of his house, acted like it, and was given his due respect.  I’m not trying to act all manly and demand respect.  I’m a firm believer that respect is earned, not given freely, though I respect everyone I meet until they prove otherwise.  Anyways, I’ve never had a problem communicating my ideals and beliefs to anyone.  I speak my feelings and thoughts with clarity and passion and will even clarify everything so there will be no mistakes as to what I’m saying, but all of that falls on deaf ears when it comes to my wife.  Lack of communication is one of the most frustrating and damaging things that can happen in a relationship.  It will leave all parties involved feeling unsatisfied and unhappy.

     Fortunately, I operate with the Holy Spirit and I’m able to reach beyond the pain and frustration of dealing with people who will never be able to give me happiness or meet my needs.  It took awhile to understand this concept and to achieve the level of faith necessary (a mustard seed) to have peace and joy.  I don’t fault my wife or anyone else for not being able to satisfy my needs, I just understand that that’s not what we were created for.  We were created to live in harmony with each other but that can only be accomplished if we first seek The Father and The Son Jesus Christ.  Operating outside of His will only leads to strife and if you don’t believe me, look at your own life and look at the things you’ve been through and determine if the strife you’ve went through in your life could have been avoided or lessened if you were operating within the love of Jesus Christ!

Thursday, October 6, 2011

You Can't Take The Funk Off A Skunk!

     I recall a saying from back in my youth that was, "if it walks like a duck, talks like a duck and looks like a duck, it's a duck."  That's basically saying not to doubt what you are seeing or disregard it for something else.

     The reason I bring this up is because these last couple of terms at my college I've been deluged with a bunch of material that has racist, derogatory writings and images.  I was offended, which is an issue I'm working on because I'm not supposed to be easily offended if I truly call myself a follower of Christ.

     Anyways, I called into question the reasoning behind my instructors choices for materials that we must disseminate for learning purposes.  One of my instructors informed me that we are going to watch the movie Crash for a study in characterization.  Now that could be a plausible reason for watching that movie but I'm certain there are hundreds of better movies that we could watch for the same exercise that don't have racist overtones.  We've also been reading literature that has racist overtones and again I must point out that there are thousands upon thousands of well written stories by award winning authors that we could read yet we are having to read these things.

     Now this is where I was having trouble figuring out if this is a duck or something else.  At first I wanted to dismiss the whole thing as required reading for class projects but the same instructor was giving us more material with racist overtones and that's what caused me to reconsider his motives.  I've made it known that I was uncomfortable with certain aspects of the material we're studying.  My instructor took a defensive stance but did offer to allow students who may be offended by said material to substitute it with something not offensive.  But why does my instructor choose a majority of racist material?

     I like the color blue.  I wear a lot of blue clothing.  I consciously and subconsciously pick blue over other colors because that's what I like.  I submit that formula to be applied to the above situation.  My instructors haven't admitted to being predisposed toward racist attitudes but their duck prints say differently!

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Fresh Out Of Jail!

     Man, I'm fresh outa Joe Arpio's Tent City.  Had to spend twenty-four hours there for not doing my community service last month.  I wasn't going to write anything about my experience there as I don't like re-living jail experiences but I thought I'd share with you a little of what went on in there.

     First, I must say that the hardest part of the whole experience was the part where I had to turn myself in.  That whole idea of bringing myself to jail goes against every fiber in my body.  Back in the day, when I was runnin' the streets and doing everything my flesh wanted to do, I made it a habit to make the police work for my arrest.  I would run from them, curse them, attack them, insult them, refuse to speak to them, spit on them, lie to them, anything I could to make my arrest that much more difficult for them.  And now I'm expected to turn myself in willingly and freely without a fight.  I don't think so, yet that's exactly what I did.

     The whole experience wasn't bad.  I met a few interesting people in there and saw and heard a lot of interesting things, but things started to go bad about an hour after I got in.  The sheriff came into the cell I was in and pulled me out to tell me she had good news and bad news.  The good news was, the way the judge wrote my order, I was going to be released earlier than expected.  The bad news was, I had an outstanding warrant so I was going to have to go to court and possibly have to stay longer than expected.  I got sick to my stomach over that revelation and then I went through various emotions including anger and fear.  It was right then I recognized this for an attack after which I instantly went to the Father and the Son Jesus Christ and prayed which caused me to remember that I have nothing to fear if I really trust Him and love Him, which I do.  So my fear and anger went away instantly and I started laughing at some of the ridiculous things I was hearing from some of my fellow inmates.

     One guy, who I suspect was on some heavy drugs, starting banging on the cell door demanding to speak to a supervisor because he no longer wanted to participate in being locked up and he wanted to know if he could come back the next day and try it all over again.  When they told him no he asked if he could be let out of the cell and sit down in the hallway because he was claustrophobic.  The sheriff reminded him that this was jail which is purposely made of confining spaces and that he would have to stay in the cell.  It went down hill for him after that as he started hallucinating and crying and continued to bang on the door which was making some of the other inmates angry.

     Another inmate starting talking about how easy it is to get someones identity and do all types of things to that persons accounts.  His words were very disturbing even to the point that I've considered changing my FaceBook account because he pointed out a way that was very easy to hack my page and create a new one with my identity.  I really can't believe that some people are so malicious as to destroy another persons reputation and credibility just because they can.  That made me sigh because I want to believe that every person has some good inside of them but I have to face the reality of this world that some people are inherently bad and will stay that way until the Second Coming.

     Anyways, I got out at around 3:30 pm, only five hours after I was originally scheduled to and I went home and showered.  I'm glad that experience is over and I'm glad to be free but most importantly I'm glad to know and love Jesus Christ because it's through Him I'm able to get through all adversity!